Get out of my bar, straight girl ?!!?
Hey Chloe! It's me, a token straight girl! You know me! I love mini cupcakes and Pinkberry and I caption all of my photos with the phrase "the GiRlSs <3" I have a gay friend (sometimes he's an interior designer but usually he works in fashion) whom I refer to as my hubby because I don't have a boyfriend. I also can't get over the fact that I'm single. My GBFF speaks exclusively in exclamation points and says fabulous every other word. Back to me, though. When I finish my one cupcake I head to Soul Cycle and then my gIrLs and I will put on our bandage dresses and head out to find some guyssss!! Anyway, Chloe, I read your article! I'm about to go to Barney's because Matt is being, like, so. mean. ugh. but I thought I'd type up a quick response before I head out.
If you didn't get it from the title (subtle as it is), Ms. Curran doesn't want straight women attending gay bars because "sometimes gay people need to be amongst their peers and therefore apart from you." She says this right after she denounces discrimination. Make of that what you will.
I actually get what she means. I frequent trendy bars and clubs in Manhattan and have been the victim of a nameless and silent crime: spending all night hitting on a gay guy. Or even worse, having the gays waltz in with their perfectly tailored clothes and artfully maintained day three stubble and flirt only with each other, as we straight girls are forced to wander around avoiding the guy in the baseball cap and sunglasses, Date Rape Dan. Am I going to write an article about how I want the gays out of my bar because I want to be around my "own kind?"No. For one thing, I don't really feel that way. For another, I don't want to be expelled from school and accused of a hate crime. Seriously. Imagine if a heterosexual wrote an article that there were too many gays mixing with us. That is not kosher. Oh, Chloe? Did you hear that? Kosher? Yeah, I'm Jewish. It's not cool to not let us into places anymore either. And Ditto the reverse. Because it's 2013 and you just can't really get away with saying you don't want an entire group of people at an establishment because they ruin the vibe. You can think it, you can bitch to your friends about it between bouts of rugby (that's what you guys do, right?) but you shouldn't write it.
Aside from the fact that I didn't find her jokes particularly funny, the thing that pisses me off the most is that she asserts that there is somehow a fundamental different between straight and gay people, while also implying that gay people are better dancers, furthering a few stereotypes of her own "kind" along the way. There isn't a fundamental difference. And asserting one and calling for your own space is giving ammunition to the people that don't want you to get married because you know, you and your kind are always up in the club and can't raise children. We aren't different, Chloe. Hey, lady, we're all just trying to get laid. I know you are a minority in society. I don't think that's okay. I also happen to think minority status doesn't allow you to discriminate, call me crazy.
She writes about the three kinds of women that attend gay bars: the "twirly twit" who wants to escape being hit on my men while she dances, the "dreary dilettante" who goes to gay bars for novelty, and the "accepted infidel," the friend of the gay who is reluctantly accepted I know people who to to gay bars to gawk at the culture like animals in a zoo and that, I actually agree is space invading. But aside from truly ignorant people, most people I know go to gay bars because they have gay friends or they just like the fucking bar.
Chloe, you say you don't want to officially ban straight people from gay bars. And I understand why they exist: every bar that is not a gay bar is by virtue of being a bar, a "straight" bar, because the majority of people are straight. I get that. I get the desire for your own space. But Chloe, woman to woman, this separate but equal shit is weird. And lady, if you can come to "my" bar, I can come to yours.
Let's just get along. We all want the same thing anyway: pussy.